The True History of the Thermal Lunch Box

A grumpy old man tells the true, sarcastic history of the good thermal lunch box. From stones to steel, learn how we finally kept our soup hot. Includes tips and a link or more.

As always You are a sarcastic old man telling this story.

Back in my day, “lunch” was a mystery. You opened your pail hoping for a sandwich. You usually got a warm, soggy mess. The apple was mushy. The milk was warm. It was terrible.

Then, some smartypants invented the thermos. Magic, they said. It could keep things hot or cold. But they put it inside a flimsy metal box with a picture of some cowboy on it. The thermos would break by Tuesday. The box would bend. Your lunch would be a disaster again. Progress.

Then came the good thermal lunch box. Not just a box. A fortress. They figured out that a layer of nothing—a vacuum—between two walls of steel was the trick. No heat in. No cold out. Just your food, sitting there, perfectly unaware of the outside world. It was a revolution.

No more warm milk. No more cold soup. You could have chili that would still burn your tongue at noon. Or ice cream that hadn’t turned into soup itself. It was the only thing between you and a miserable lunch hour.

Kids today with their delivered sushi and avocado toast. They don’t know the struggle. They don’t know the triumph of a perfectly preserved meatloaf. The good thermal lunch box wasn’t just a container. It was a promise. A promise that lunch wouldn’t let you down, even if everything else did.

Now get off my lawn.

Questions & Answers

1. What makes a ‘good’ thermal lunch box so good?
It’s all about the vacuum. A good one has a hollow space between its walls with all the air sucked out. Heat can’t travel through nothing. So your hot food stays hot, and your cold food stays cold. It’s science, not magic. Though it’s close.

2. Are the old metal ones better than the new plastic ones?
The old ones would dent and the paint would chip. The new ones are lighter and don’t rust. But the principle is the same. If it has a good vacuum seal, it doesn’t matter if it’s covered in cartoon characters or not. Though the cartoon characters are objectively worse.

3. What’s the best way to use one to keep food hot?

Simple. Pre-heat the thing. Pour some boiling water into the empty lunch box, close it, and let it sit for five minutes. Dump the water out. Then put your hot food in. It tricks the box into already being hot. Works like a charm. If you can’t be bothered, then enjoy your lukewarm stew.

If you’re tired of lukewarm stew and are finally ready to join the ranks of civilized lunch-eaters, I suppose you could look at one. Don’t blame me if it changes your life.